This Is What America Could Be

“What we have here , in this neighborhood, is what America could be. Those words were said to me almost 30 years ago by an elderly black man in Detroit while he and I drank a beer on his front porch, talked and watched the neighbors pass by. I was there for a room mates wedding, as his best man, and this was the first time, away from a military base, that I witnessed such a diverse group of families all living near each other. He pointed to the house across the street and said to me; there lives an elderly woman ,that at the time of her moving here, had never met anyone who was black because the whole area was white. But as things changed she went with the flow and was now a good friend to him and his family. He then proceeded to point out various houses and people and tell me how all of them, ethnically speaking, were different and yet all of them had adjusted and everyone looked out for each other. He then repeated what he had said earlier about how all of America could be this way if we all chose it to be like this. This was a man old enough to have had grand parents that were slaves and yet he didn't focus on that instead he looked for the good.

This past weekend ,during an annual gathering in the north country, I was reminded of the truth of that once again. As I said in an earlier post I have a very diverse group of friends. For many of them, it goes way beyond friendship to being family.

Between rain drops and down pours, high winds and cold, we managed to have a couple of bon fires, lots of food and beverage. Some of the kids were even crazy enough to get into the water even though the air temperature was about 60-65. We had a good time.

But it's really the people involved that made this a good time.

This group consisted of black, white and Hispanic. We are a group from three states and two countries. We are a group of people who are liberal, conservative and libertarian. We have folks that are Christian, others that are close to being atheists, and some of us who practice Reform Judaism. We are a group who has everything from small children to elderly and handicapped. We are from Brooklyn, From the coast of Maine, Vermont and Ontario. We discussed everything from politics to religion and conspiracy theories. We laughed ,we joked, and we remembered days and times gone by. We talked about issues that the politically correct would say we couldn't and yet there was no anger no finger pointing or accusations, why? Because what we have is love and respect.

It's not that we agree on everything,we don't by any stretch, but we don't spend our time arguing over it we instead listen to each others perspective and views and generally speak to each other in a civilized manner. Notice I didn't suggest we don't do a bit of teasing and having some fun with it but we don't do it in a bitter and angry sort of way.

That is part of my reason for not understanding some of the so called “leaders” out there on either sides of the aisle, who scream and rant and rage, particularly when it comes to race. I am never quite sure what it is they hope to accomplish by making racially loaded comments. I could sit here and name names, but most of you already know the people I am talking about. So why is it then, if the average American can have friends and family that are from all races and walks of life, that people like these “leaders” are even listened to any more? They don't seem to understand that the real problem is the breakdown of the family and this is an issue facing all communities whether it's in the inner cities or in rural towns. This is not an issue that is just facing one race, it's affecting all races. This progressive idea of marginalizing men as being an unimportant part of the family structure has led to fathers skipping out on their responsibilities. At one time being a teen age mom would have been a scandal, now they make reality shows out of it and pay these girls to keep at it. Parents are not taking the responsibility for their kids and disciplining them when they need it, instead listening to those other so called experts who suggest that disciplining your children will do them more harm then good and then wondering why their kids are doing just about anything they wish and they are making the parents afraid. To make it worse we have Hollywood glorifying all of it.

You want to end all of this? Quit talking and start acting. Teach your children responsibility for their own actions and respect for others. Teach them love and not hate. They are your children if you don't stand up and do it who will? The government isn't going to do it and Holly wood glorifies all that is wrong so it all rests on you and me.

My children don't hate and neither do the children of my friends. We have all taught our children love and respect for others and themselves and we demonstrate that when we all get together. It can happen if you try and,as the elderly gentleman said to me all those years ago, this is what America could be.